The Truth About Pregnancy No One Warns You About
After being fed the same steady diet of cultural fairy tales as everyone else, I went into pregnancy like a kid at Disney World. I was wide-eyed, ready for the magic, and sure the next nine months would be the happiest time of my life.
But pregnancy often gets romanticized, leaving many of us feeling like we’re not quite measure up to the blooming, radiant image portrayed. What I wish I had heard was the cold-hard truth, so my expectations weren’t shattered and, more importantly, I was prepared.
In this article:
Pregnancy Myths vs. Reality
What Pregnancy Really Feels Like
Emotional Challenges During Pregnancy
Why I’d Do It All Again
Pregnancy Myths vs. Reality
Everyone told me I would love every minute. I’d be floating with a hand on my perfect bump and high on a maternal connection to my unborn child. I believed them. And then I got pregnant.
While I was undeniably thrilled about getting pregnant at 36 years old, it cracked open every myth I’d ever swallowed about what it should feel like:
The “pregnancy glow.” I expected luminous skin and shiny hair. What I got was hormonal acne, and my once curly hair went straight.
The morning sickness window. Okay, so I actually skipped the nausea. But my best friend was queasy at dawn, 11 a.m., 3 p.m., and 10 p.m. No time slot was safe.
Effortless bump life. In my head I’d be dressing my cute bump in flowy dresses. In reality I was stuffing myself into anything stretchy.
The blissful nesting stage. While I imagined folding baby clothes, I was actually rage-cleaning the oven, sweating through panic and heartburn.
The “you’ll feel so connected to your baby” promise. Some days I did. Other days, I felt like a host in an Alien movie, about to have a Chestburster explode out of my hijacked body.
“You’ll be glowing with confidence.” I felt vulnerable, moody, and Googling “is this normal” like a full-time job.
“Pregnancy will bring you and your partner closer.” Some nights it did. But most nights, his snores seemed like justification for homicide.
Pregnancy doesn’t just rewrite your body; it can dim the parts of you that once felt vibrant and alive. But there are ways to find your spark again if you feel like you’ve lost your “pink” along the way.
What Pregnancy Really Feels Like
Pregnancy transforms your body in ways no one puts on Instagram. Most of it is uncomfortable, some of it is downright painful, and all of it is part of the process of growing a human.
Fatigue – Progesterone keeps your pregnancy healthy, but it also drains your energy. Add random insomnia and your body working overtime, and exhaustion becomes your baseline.
Pain (Back, Pelvis, Round Ligaments) – A growing uterus shifts your center of gravity and loosens ligaments, which strains your spine and joints. Pelvic pressure plus sudden stabbing “round ligament pain” means standing, walking, or even rolling in bed can trigger aches.
Breast Tenderness – Hormones increase blood flow to prep for lactation. The result: even a T-shirt brushing your skin can feel unbearable.
Urination & Constipation – The uterus presses on your bladder, making you pee constantly, while progesterone slows digestion and iron supplements add to the backup.
Swelling – Fluid retention makes ankles, feet, and even hands puff up—more “balloon animal” than “pregnancy glow.”
Shortness of Breath – As your diaphragm gets squished, even tying your shoes feels like cardio.
Braxton Hicks Contractions – Labeled “practice,” but they can be surprisingly intense.
Leg Cramps – Blood flow changes and pressure on veins can make your calves seize out of nowhere.
All these shifts are your body’s way of adapting to pregnancy, but knowing the why behind them doesn’t make the discomfort easier to manage.
Emotional Challenges During Pregnancy
Pregnancy hormones don’t just change your body. Motherhood changes your emotions in ways no one talks about. Some shifts are fleeting, others are heavier, but all are real.
Mood Swings – Estrogen and progesterone can flip your emotions in seconds, from tears over a commercial to rage at an empty milk carton.
Anxiety – Even if you’re not naturally anxious, pregnancy can spark late-night spirals about your baby’s health, your body, and your ability to parent.
Increased Sensitivity – Sounds feel louder, smells hit harder, and comments cut deeper than before.
Nesting Instinct – The sudden urge to deep clean at 2 a.m. is your brain’s way of prepping for baby.
Changes in Libido – Hormones can either crank up desire or shut it down completely—both are normal.
Depression – Prenatal depression goes beyond sadness. It can feel like hopelessness and disconnection, often made worse when others expect constant joy.
On top of that, I personally faced another layer: quitting Wellbutrin after a decade to avoid even a small risk to my baby. Without it, I spiraled into a dark place where hormones and the loss of my safety net collided. It was proof that pregnancy isn’t just physically taxing, it’s mentally demanding, too.
The emotional toll deserves as much compassion and support as the physical one. Both are valid, and both matter.
Why I’d Do It All Again
As much as pregnancy wrecked me, I still want another child. Not because I’m eager to relive the swollen ankles, mood swings, or the marathon of labor—trust me, I am not. But because I want my son to have a sibling, and because my husband and I have always known we weren’t “one and done.”
That said, I have so much respect for people who make that choice. My best friend stopped at one, and I support her fully, because raising kids is not easy, and the right family size is deeply personal.
I also won’t sugarcoat it. I don’t think everyone finds having a baby “worth it,” especially in that brutal first year. For me, it was the hardest stretch of my life. Physically draining, emotionally isolating, and a complete identity shift all at once.
But even in the struggle, something undeniable stands out; women’s strength. We carry, birth, and raise children while juggling pain, exhaustion, and expectations that are often unrealistic. Men are strong in their own ways, sure, but there’s a reason the human race relies on women to literally create life.
We do it, we survive it, and many of us choose to do it again. That’s power.
